life round here

Most of times, the life I’m leading on right now feels too overwhelming. It feels like something that I bid too high but can’t afford to pay. Sometimes, I have this strong urge to leave my life completely behind; my house, my family, my eduction, and just go somewhere else where no one knows me. I want to be entirely myself but also entirely new self. In other words, that new-self me will be me just being myself entirely. I want my happiness to not be defined by how much I possess or how fancy my job is. I want that new-self to feel enough with simple life and be endlessly thankful to what I am and what I have. That’s how I want my happiness to be defined by. The new me will have so many possibilities: I’ll probably travel a lot, meet a lot of people, be nice to strangers, help people, read a lot of books, have fun with kids, BE A COOK! (like my mother), have a ramen shop, et cetera. I want that despite no matter how silly, unpromising, my days I’ll be facing, I still feel enough, thankful, and happy of everything by the end of the day.

Sometimes I just want to leave, and do all that.